When Insults Had Class . . .
I received this email today. I haven’t had a chances to run it by Snopes or verify any of these. But I thought some of them were pretty funny and you might enjoy them.
Classic but witty insults from some of the world’s wittiest . . . .
“He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.”
Winston Churchill
“I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure.”
Clarence Darrow
“He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary.”
William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway)
“I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn’t it.”
Groucho Marx
“I didn’t attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.”
Mark Twain
“He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.”
Oscar Wilde
“I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend… If you have one.”
George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill… followed by Churchill’s response:
“Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second, if there is one.”
Winston Churchill
“I feel so miserable without you; it’s almost like having you here.”
Stephen Bishop
“He is a self-made man and worships his creator.”
John Bright
“I’ve just learned about his illness. Let’s hope it’s nothing trivial.”
Irvin S. Cobb
“He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others.”
Samuel Johnson
“He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up.”
Paul Keating
“He had delusions of adequacy.”
Walter Kerr
“Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?”
Mark Twain
“His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork.”
Mae West
“Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.”
Oscar Wilde
Posted by Brad Fallon on Tuesday, March 25th, 2008 at 2:14 pm 
I like the one from Groucho Marx. People used to express themselves much more cleverly than they do now.
hilarious! So much better than the sad insults that we exchange these days. At least, those were some real dissing! Totally cool!
There’s nothing like a swift rebbutle (referring to Churchill’s response to Shaw).
Gift Ideas Blog
Good quotes Brad,
That reminds me of my favorite Winston Churchill quote I hear long ago. When I hear it is was stated as a factual quote but I have yet to research this:
“A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.”
– Sir Winston Churchill
Thanks for the insight of the quotes Brad.
- Tony
Winston Churchill was a master of the art. He provided a valuable inspiration growing up!
I really enjoyed your positive splendiferous post Brad. Thanks for this.
Keep it real.
P.S. Where is your digg button?
I like Mark Twain’s quotes and stories his outlook on life was very different. When I read his books I find myself saying “How come I never thought about a particular aspect of life as he did even though I come across the same situations and meet similar people”
Here’s another funny quote “I love all mankind but its people I can’t stand”
Boy, there are some really great ones on there!
Great quotes Brad.
I found some of them funny. Others I had to think about before I got the meaning
JP
Contextual Targeted Traffic
I never knew Winston Churchill was so Catty!
I suppose thats what you get for going el mano in a world war
I didnt think i’d see Paul Keating quoted anywhere since he was replaced years ago… First time for everything!
Keep them coming.
Dr Andrew Power
Hypnosis Melbourne
Great quotes, a few made me chuckle.
My Favourite would have to be the stork one!
Priceless
These quotes are great, but If one was uttered today, I’m sure there would be lawsuits aplenty. My favorite Winston Churchill quip was a short and sweet debate with Lady Astor:
“Lady Nancy Astor: Winston, if you were my husband, I’d poison your tea.
Churchill: Nancy, if I were your husband, I’d drink it.”
This is quite a collection of quotes. Quite a few of them I’ve never read. Thanks for brightening my day.
Stac…
Valley Shed
Winston Churchill is such a hero of mine. I have a picture of him on my vision board.
I think the reason people don’t have such catty rebuttals anymore is that we all rely too much on profanity and just good old fashioned viciousness.
Great quotes, such wit! Churchill is a real hero of mine, i’ve even got his speeches on tape!
Nick
http://www.healthydinnerrecipesblog.com
What nothing from the great Johny Carson?
Great Marx comment. Interesting to have Marx and Churchill in the same group of quotes–I guess that is a different Marx.